18 weeks ago, I was posed with a challenge. Post something, Kayla. Why don’t you post something?
Not write something. Writing was a thing I did, and did often. As for posting? Posting was something I did sparingly and in secret, for fear that if people read what I had to say, I would be found out as a pretender. Unintelligent, or worse yet… uninteresting. I’m not the type to charge at a challenge. In fact, I tend to shy away from difficulty. Still, I was determined that 2016 was going to be a year of change for me, so I took the challenge laid before me.
It was great. For as long as I can remember, my biggest adversaries in writing were bravery and discipline. Too afraid to be forthright. Always starting and never finishing. Writing these pieces and posting them weekly helped me to master the discipline of commitment. As for bravery and forthrightness? Well… While my content may be thought provoking, I can’t say much of what I’ve written has proved to be truly provocative. (Like all great art must be)
Somewhere along the way, I became redundant. And stale. Bored, and boring. “Work on developing your voice.” “Keep your pieces 500 words long, no more.” “Make sure it’s cohesive – beginning, middle and end.” “Write something relevant.” “Make sure it resolves.” Tweak this. Change that. By week 15, I may have been writing correctly…. But I’m also certain that I’d forgotten to include what it was that made me fall in love with writing in the first place.
A space to be honest, and raw, and open – without fear of judgement and without need for applause. Not to live or die by stats or views, but to give myself a place to process out loud. To scream in silence. Less than 4 months in, and already I was a tired sell out, trying to give the people what they wanted in order to glean some kind of appreciation or affirmation as a writer. Something had to change.
So, reader. Maybe you care, or maybe you don’t. But here’s the deal. I will continue to release articles (or blogs that somewhat resemble articles), weekly.
In the meantime (by that I mean the in-between time!), I will also post other things. Things like poetry. And, personal pieces. I plan to have a few guest writers. And, descriptions of all the interesting people I collect along my way. I might offend you. Or, cause you to roll your eyes. I may write about things you don’t deem fit for decent folk. But, that’s okay.
I won’t social media blast them or anything. I don’t wanna annoy my friends with anything as trivial as my lifelong dream potentially being fulfilled. But, post I will.
You can read them, or you can not. They’ll be here. I’ll be here. You can check in at kmayadao.com for all your viewing pleasures. Cause this is mine.
I hope you do. Until next time.