kayfromhome

Life moves so fast.  As the years go by, time seems to rampage more than it marches.  Maybe it’s the N in my INFJ, but now that I’m 3 years out from 30, my existential musings have kicked into overdrive.  I’ve attained an adultier version of adult than that of my younger adult self.  Soon enough, I’ll be kissing my 20’s goodbye.  Rough.

Life hasn’t always come together in the way I dreamt it would.  At 27, I feel the need to ask myself: Have I done all that I’ve wanted to do?  More importantly, am I who I thought I’d be?

There are things I wish I had known in my early 20’s.

Things like…

• Don’t waste yourself on people that don’t have potential for longevity. There’s nothing like buddying up with a gaggle of giggly, noisy girls for a year in college, only to lose touch with them a millisecond after graduation.  I wish I had invested my time in the people I wanted to see stick around post-grad; the people I’d like to attend my wedding, play with my children, and hold my hand at my parents’ funeral.

• Save more money.  $10 for Apple Music, $7.99 for Netflix, half-off apps at Applebees… that stuff adds up.  As do car loans, and school loans, and those super cute leather boots, with the corset style lacing up the front. (Swoon!)  This may sound super fuddy, but I really wish I had put away more cash for the future, instead of giving in to the urge to splurge.

• Making excuses for myself.  I can think of so many times I’ve cheated myself out of growth opportunities by creating excuses to justify bad behaviors.  Excusing bad habits is equivalent to lying to your doctor.  If you explain away the symptoms, you never get around to diagnosing the disease.  No one wants to own up to illness.  Myself included.  But you can’t cure a sickness you won’t admit to having.  In the same way, you’ll never change a habit you refuse to look in the eye.

BONUS:  One day, there will be a Daniel. The trouble I would have saved myself from, knowing this!  But that’s another blog, for another day.

There are also things I’d like to do before the big 3-0. 

Things like…

• Get out of debt.  School loans are no joke, and the middle class tax bracket doesn’t cut any breaks.  I’d really love to pay off my existing debt before acquiring something crazy, like a mortgage.

• Write a book.  Real story, I’ve wanted to write a book since I was 7 years old.  Growing up, I didn’t realize that kids my age were making friends outside of pages.  I also didn’t realize that not everyone’s grandma scolded them for bringing their books to the dinner table.  Actually… I didn’t realize a lot of things.  Probably, because I usually had my nose stuck in a book.  While my tone is more conversational than fantastical (my genre of preference), I’d still like to try my hand at it.

• Visit Belize.  A friend of mine zip-lined in Belize for her honeymoon, and it’s been a top-10 destination in my mind ever since.  I have two words for you, readers.  Beachfront treehouses.

While I haven’t done everything I’ve wanted to do, I have a sense that I’m exactly who I need to be for today.  And that’s good enough for me, for now at least.

As for 30. Well… I guess we’ll just have to see, won’t we?