I realized a long time ago, that I am not really a lover.
I am a fighter.
At the core of who I am, I am petty and spiteful; impatient and unkind. I am arrogant and jealous, selfish and rude. I am irritable, and resentful, and I refuse to bear all things, because I don’t have to put up with this if I don’t want to!
That is my base nature. My flawed humanity. It is who I am, unredeemed, unrepentant and without God. And, I have no doubt that I am not the only one.
I know nothing, if not who I am. I am the girl who will nitpick and cause a fuss over things that don’t really matter. I am the woman who has grace for strangers, that never seems to extend as far as the people I love. I am the type who is unforgiving and unrelenting, and unable to love like God without Him.
1 Corinthians 13 is one of the more commonly known verses of the Bible. Often quoted in weddings, verses 4-7 speak of a biblical love that is kind, patient, and hopeful.
I mean… What? Who loves like that?
I am definitely not a lover. At least not as lovers are defined in this context.
- Keeps no record of wrongs
- Does not delight in evil
- Does not insist on having its own way
For all that I am, I’m a far cry from the picture of a biblical lover. In fact, time after time, I find myself in direct opposition to these commands. Why is that? I mean, I love God. And, I love His people.
Usually. Kind of. As best as I can.
In these next few weeks, I am going to explore what it’s like to love the way Paul admonishes us to. And what hang ups hold me back from doing so.
I hope you’ll join me in the journey.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
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